A few years ago, I left Facebook because it had become so toxic that it was starting to affect my mental, emotional, and even physical health and well-being. When I returned, it seemed the environment had vastly improved, so I set up a page there again. Today, I am reconsidering that decision.

Over the past year, the environment has become more and more toxic. Trainers from both the balanced and the rewards-based/force-free communities are at war with each other yet again, thanks in large part to one social media influencer who is actively trying to wipe out the entire community of balanced, common-sense trainers. He claims to be a force-free trainer, but he has been caught out several times using the very things he claims to be against: force and intimidation. He justifies it by calling it “management”, but anyone with eyes and the ability for critical thinking can see the hypocrisy.

My point is this: People from both sides are at each other’s throats. Very serious accusations have been flying back and forth, and no one seems to care who gets hurt in the crossfire. For a long time, I was able to bite my tongue – until the influencer equated balanced trainers with domestic violence. That was a huge line to cross, and before I knew it, I had jumped into the fire with both feet.

This morning, I woke up and realized that the moment I jumped into that mess, I compromised my integrity. As a trainer, I need to lead by example; I can’t expect owners to trust or respect me if I’m hurling insults or firing off accusations I can’t actually prove to be true, or bullying others, or generally behaving like a spoiled brat throwing a temper tantrum. As a human being, I can’t expect anyone to respect me or follow me if I’m lowering myself to the levels of bad behavior I’ve been seeing more and more.

Today, I am rethinking my decision to give Facebook another chance. Allowing myself to be triggered into what I feel is a serious compromise of my integrity and values… That is not okay. I’m trying to help owners and their dogs, and I’m not doing that – I’m not leading by example – by participating in the ongoing, endless war between the two major methodologies.

Thank you for your continued support. I will do better and I will be better from here on out. Have a great day and a great weekend, and remember to stay calm and lead on.